Wednesday, March 12, 2008

God is the Plaster that Fills the Cracks in my Soul



Yeah, DovBear, Harry Maryles, and others have previously pointed out those Kupat Ha'ir mailings that promise all kinds of wonderful benefits that will accrue in this world to those who donate to their organization. But did you know that by donating to Kupat Aniyei Eretz Yisrael (Vaad Harabanim) you can cure the cracks in your wall? It's true! Just read the following testimonial:

"After investing $1 Million in a luxury villa, I celebrated with a large chanukat habayit. Within weeks I saw unsightly cracks in one wall. I quickly called down a handyman to plaster it, but all for naught. The cracks kept returning & expanding upwards, covering almost the entire wall. Then I chanced upon a bracha from the holy Tazddik, Rabbi David Abuchatzerha that promised good fortune to those who donate to Vaad HaRabbanim. I promised 18,000 shekel. Within days I found a wonderful contractor who showed me that the underlying problem was that the wall was sinking in. He fixed it while barely charging the minimum. It's been a year now and the wall still looks as good as new!"

Here's another amusing one (not that I am trivializing the heartbreak of eczema, chas v'shalom!)

"Our child was born with severe eczema that covered his body" [what follows is a description of the boy's chronic problems and the futility of treating him]. "The Vaad's Purim brochure arrived in the mail and we pledged a considerable sum. The next morning my wife met an acquaintance who after noticing our sons horrible appearance, asked what was wrong with him. When my wife explained, she said that a new medicine just arrive from N.Y. With the help of this remedy, our son is totally healed. Our personal Purim miracle!"

Of course, the brochure also has the standard miracles of helping someone find a job, or of giving birth to a healthy baby after having previously lost two others. But for those who don't have such heavy burdens it's good to know that Hashem is also involved with lesser matters and personally gets involved with home repair and acne medicine.

Normally I would have tossed the brochure into the trash as I don't respond well to segulot and the implicit promise of reward. But I felt strangely compelled to watch the movie that was on the included CD. And frankly, I was moved by some of the stories helped by the organization, and was impressed by the apparently extensive oversight that goes into Kupat Aniyei Eretz Yisrael. So in spite of the offense that I took regarding their mailing, I'm sending them a check today. (Of course, I couldn't find anything about them on the standard charity watcher websites, such as Guidestar or Charity Navigator, but I'll take a chance that my modest contribution won't be wasted.)

In any event, I'll let you know if any personal miracle happens to me as a result.

3 comments:

mushroomjew said...

Your mailbox will miraculously fill up with 10 times as many tzedadah flyers within days.

Frum Heretic said...

Your mailbox will miraculously fill up with 10 times as many tzedadah flyers within days.

I love it! Thanks for a good laugh this morning...

Frum Heretic said...

Your mailbox will miraculously fill up with 10 times as many tzedadah flyers within days.

I love it! Thanks for a good laugh this morning...